Mar 15, 2013

Haunted Nights

Photo credit: Bérenger ZYLA / Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND

Waking up in a cold sweat.
Same dream that haunts me nightly
and causes me to bolt straight up in bed.
Fog, children screaming, shots ringing.
 I stare at my uniform in confusion.

@ donetta sifford 3-15-2013


http://www.trifectawritingchallenge.com/2013/03/trifextra-week-fifty-nine.html

13 comments:

  1. I saw where you were going and still loved it. I dig dark and weird. well done.

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  2. dark and weird - I think Lance said it well. This made me sit up when finished reading.

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  3. Donetta, thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting! This is a very good poem. It builds until that final statement; very potent, very dark, and foreshadowing the PTSD that will be even harder to manage once the soldier is home. Peace, Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.com/2013/03/15/mama-needs-a-brand-new-bag-a-barlette/

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  4. A nightmare that spawns nightmares. Well done

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  5. Scary. I find myself wondering: is it a military uniform, or a prison uniform? You don't have to answer that - I like the ambiguity. Great little poem.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. As I read back over it, I do like that it could suggest either one. :)

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  6. How scary to have such nightmares!An excellent piece of writing:-)

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  7. So dark and intense. Love your take on the prompt. Well done!

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  8. Great imagery; the cries of the children and the fog of dream-memory...

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  9. As was said, I love the ambiguity. Lovely
    and chilling.

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  10. I was already loving it, but that final line packed a punch! Great work.

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  11. Sounds like a nightmare you can't wake up from. brrr.

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Comments and feedback are very much appreciated....